You're kinda, sorta, basically, pretty much always on my mind. -- psacake.com

Happy Mothers Day

This is for the mothers who have sat up all night with sick toddlers in their arms, wiping up barf laced with wieners and cherryKool-Aid saying, "It's okay honey, Mommy's here."

Who have sat in rocking chairs for hours on end soothing crying babies who can't be comforted.

This is for all the mothers who show up at work with spit-up in their hair and milk stains on their blouses and diapers in their purse.

For all the mothers who run car-pools and make cookies and sew Halloween costumes. And all the mothers who DON'T.

This is for the mothers who gave birth to babies they'll never see. And the mothers who took those babies and gave them homes.

This is for the mothers whose priceless art collections are hanging on their refrigerator doors.

And for all the mothers who froze their buns on metal bleachers at soccer games instead of watching from the warmth of their cars, so that when their kids asked, "Did you see me, Mom?" they could say, "Of course, I wouldn't have missed it for the world," and mean it.

This is for all the mothers who yell at their kids in the grocery store and swat them in despair when they stomp their feet and scream for ice cream before dinner. And for all the mothers who count to ten instead, but realize how child abuse happens.

This is for all the mothers who go hungry, so their children can eat. For all the mothers who read "Goodnight, Moon" twice a night for a year. And then read it again. "Just one more time."

This is for all the mothers who taught their children to tie their shoelaces before they started school. And for all the mothers who opted for Velcro instead.

This is for all the mothers who teach their sons to cook and their daughters to sink a jump shot.

This is for every mother whose head turns automatically when a little voice calls "Mom?" in a crowd, even though they know their own offspring are away at college.

This is for all the mothers who sent their kids to school with stomachaches, assuring them they'd be just FINE once they got there, only to get calls from the school nurse an hour later asking them to please pick them up. Right away.

This is for mothers whose children have gone astray, who can't find the words to reach them.

For all the mothers who bite their lips when their 14 year olds dye their hair green.

For all the mothers of the victims of recent school shootings, and the mothers of those who did the shooting.

For the mothers of the survivors, and the mothers who sat in front of their TVs in horror, hugging their child who just came home from school, safely.

This is for all the mothers who taught their children to be peaceful, and now pray they come home safely from a war.

What makes a good Mother anyway?

Is it patience?

Compassion?

The ability to nurse a baby, cook dinner, and sew a button on a shirt, all at the same time?

Or is it in her heart?

Is it the ache you feel when you watch your son or daughter disappear down the street, walking to school alone for the very first time?

The jolt that takes you from sleep at 2 A.M. to check that your sleeping baby is really sleeping?

The panic, years later, that comes again at 2 A.M. when you just want to hear their key in the door and know they are safe again in your home?

Or the need to flee from wherever you are and hug your child when you hear news of a car accident, a child dying?

The emotions of motherhood are universal and so our thoughts are for young mothers stumbling through diaper changes and sleep deprivation...

And mature mothers learning to let go.

For working mothers and stay-at-home mothers.

Single mothers and married mothers..

Mothers with money, mothers without.

This is for you all.

Hang in there. In the end we can only do the best we can. Tell them every day that we love them. And pray.

0 Comments | Perm-a-link | 5/8/2005

Welcome to the World

Welcome to the world Kathryn Grace!

Can't wait to buy lots of Barbie shoes for your dad to step on in the middle of the night!

What They Said:

Baby Katies DAD says Oh Man on 5/8/2005
LBF says Welcome to Girl-land. on 5/9/2005
YOBB says Always a princess? on 5/9/2005
Just wait until they turn 16.

3 Comments | Perm-a-link | 5/6/2005

Fell off the face of the earth

Ok.. not really, but I've been busier than a one armed paper hanger. Generally speaking it's a good thing, but enough is enough already.

Taxes

Did you file on time?
American taxpayers spend $200 billion and 5.4 billion hours working to comply with federal taxes each year, more than it takes to produce every car, truck, and van in the United States.

The Gettysburg address is 269 words, the Declaration of Independence is 1,337 words, and the Holy Bible is only 773,000 [I don't know what version the author was referring to] words. However, the tax law has grown from 11,400 words in 1913, to 7 million words today.

There are at least 480 different tax forms, each with many pages of instructions. Even the easiest form, the 1040EZ has 33 pages in instructions, and all in fine print.

Taxes eat up 38.2% of the average family's income; that's more than for food, clothing and shelter combined.

Each tax season, Americans go through 236,000 gallons of coffee and 1.2 million cigarettes while preparing their returns.

0 Comments | Perm-a-link | 4/18/2005

Saltine Challeng

This is known as "The Saltine Challenge". The Saltine Challenge is basically attempting to consume a total of six saltines in sixty seconds without water or anything that can help you swallow them. Sounds like an easy task right? Wrong.

If you've tried this before or are going to try it, time yourself and post the results in a comment. Make sure to include how many times you attempted this before you were able to do it (if you were able to do it). Supposedly, less than 1 in 10 people can do this successfully so good luck!

Dumb Ass

On 3 February 1990, David Zaback attempted to hold up H&J Leather & Firearms Ltd., a gun shop located in Renton Highlands near Seattle, Washington. About 4:40 p.m. that day, he entered the crowded shop and announced his intention to rob it by telling everyone to put their hands on the counter and saying if anybody moved, he'd kill them. He then spotted a uniformed policeman having coffee with Wendall Woodall, the shop's owner. What happened next is less than clear in terms of who shot first, but there was an exchange of gunfire between David Zaback, the would-be robber; Timothy Lally, an 18-year veteran of the King County police force; and Danny Morris, one of the shop's clerks.

Zaback, who had fired three times, was shot three times in the chest and once in the arm. He died in the hospital about four hours after the shooting. No one else was injured during the incident, and no charges were subsequently laid against Lally or Morris.

Renton police Capt. Don Persson said, "The surprising thing is that the man had to walk right past a marked police car to get in the front door."

[Snopes]

What They Said:

BBS says 1:38 on 4/10/2005
I had all 6 in my mouth and chewed in like 15 seconds... However I was unable to swallow them in the alotted time.

1 Comments | Perm-a-link | 3/31/2005

Bad boys bad boys

The Mayor of Philadelphia, in response to a rash of murders in his city, has declared the violence throughout the city a crisis and as a result has ordered the full review of police department policies and has suggested a full moratorium on the issuing of gun permits.

Makes sense..right?
Well..let's see... for the people that are carrying legally, or applying for permits to legally carry have, in most states:

no felony convictions
never been convicted of a druff offense
no mental defects
submitted fingerprints
passed a criminal history background check
paid for mandatory state training
paid the fee for the license

Do you think the bad guys did all that? Do you really think that someone that has gone through the trouble of legally obtaining a license to carry would do it so they could commit murder?

Math is hard..

Ok.. a math problem for you.

If you could take a regular piece of paper and fold it in half, and then in half again, and again... until you've done it 50 times. (I know.. you can only fold a piece of paper in half 7 times... but if you could) How tall would the stack of paper be?

As tall as a ream of paper?
As tall as the Boston phone book?

What's your guess?

What They Said:

BBS says My Guess on 3/21/2005
FBI says The Feds on 3/22/2005
Doug says That�s a whole stack of pages! on 3/25/2005
I have not attempted to calculate the height, but it is equivalent to 562,949,953,421,312 (563 trillion pages, or the height of 1,125,899,906,842.624 reams of paper). The first fold gets you to the thickness of two sheets. After that, you are raising by a power of two 49 more times, so the answer should be 2^49.

I have also read, although never tried it, that no human can fold a sheet of newspaper 8 times, if I am remembering correctly.

3 Comments | Perm-a-link | 3/21/2005

The Big "O"

There is absolutely nothing intentionally funny about this photo.

ESPN.com: "Woods comes from behind..." Click the link.. you'll understand.

0 Comments | Perm-a-link | 3/8/2005

Spring

You know it's almost Spring when the girls start showing their BellyButtons.

I want this job

If there's one thing better than a free lunch, it's getting paid for it.

And Quincy Police Chief Robert F. Crowley does - nearly $150 a week.

He also gets paid to "read" - $91 a week, to cover the cost of reading material related to law enforcement work.

: snip :

The amount paid in some benefits varies among department employees because it is based on hourly wages. Crowley, the chief, receives $7,747 a year for lunch, $4,749 for reading, $1,500 for longevity, and $975 for uniforms.

$30 a day for lunch? That aint the Mickey Dee's drivethrough, and $20 a day in magazines? This is nothing short of embezzlement of taxpayers' money, brought to you via greedy, overpaid, union bosses.

How 'bout we cut this crap before we start laying off teachers? Why don't we eliminate these "benefits" before we go blame the Governor's proposed budget cuts?
[via]

0 Comments | Perm-a-link | 3/3/2005

No NHL

The NHL has become the first major professional league in North America to cancel an entire season because of a labor dispute. This also marks the first time the Stanley Cup was not awarded since a flu epidemic canceled the finals in 1919.

Hey.. wait a minute.. when was the last time the Red Sox won the World Series? Uh.. you guessed it.. 1919. The Curse of The Bambino has shifted?!

What They Said:

BBS says At least there is NASCAR on 2/17/2005
Conor should be less unhappy that it is cancelled because the Gentlemen have started their engines.
The Gatorade Duel 150's today where GREAT!!!
Kenny Wallace show that not all professional athletes are greedy and don't really care

1 Comments | Perm-a-link | 2/17/2005

who'da thunk that?

The Good - Dave Heineman, the new governor of Nebraska promised to write his letters on the left over stationary bearing the name of his predecessor (Gov.Mike Johnson). If we watch our pennies together, said Heineman, ultimately we can save millions.

The Odd - The King of Bhutan, a dedicated smoker whose largely Buddhist country, has banned the sale of all tobacco products. The king said he wanted to give up smoking but found it too hard otherwise. His four wives were nagging him to stop.

The Uggh...A remote Louisiana town became the last place in America to get telephone service. Resident Elaine Edwards had her new phone for 15 minutes when it rang. It was a telemarketer.

ed. all of the above submitted by an avid reader of this site.

What They Said:

Cupid says On Valentines Day on 2/15/2005
Valentine's Day is like the opposite of Christmas. On Christmas we go to bed looking forward to exchanging gifts with the people we love. On Valentine's Day we exchange gifts hoping to go to bed with the people we love.

1 Comments | Perm-a-link | 2/14/2005